Gideon Kodua remembers the moment the harsh realities of what it takes to become a professional footballer set in. The tears were streaming down his face after the transition from academy stardom to League One had proved more difficult than he envisioned at the end of the 2023-24 season. During a six-month loan spell with League One side Wycombe Wanderers, the former West Ham United trainee failed to score in 10 appearances. Having been tipped for great things after a crucial role in West Ham's FA Youth Cup-winning team in 2022-23, Kodua hit a bump in the road — one that he has clearly learned from. Nearly two years on from his first loan, the 21-year-old is Luton Town's top goalscorer with 10 goals as Jack Wilshere's team sit 10th in the third tier. 'If I tell you everything that happened, we'd be here for hours,' Kodua, who made his summer loan to Kenilworth Road permanent in January, tells The Athletic at Luton's training ground. 'I definitely learnt that confidence is a big thing in football. There reached a point where I was facing self-doubt every day. I'd gone from scoring goals in the under-21s to struggling in League One. In my eyes, I could've done better. Everyone was saying I did well, but I disagree. The sadness was gradual. I was emotional a lot; I'm an emotional person. I might not show it, but that was a difficult time for me. After sessions, I'd go home and cry, or even stay in my car and cry. I'd be at home, beating myself up. In my mind, I should've been doing better. I'd say things like, 'This isn't good enough, that shouldn't have happened, what is going on?' I was in a dark place, and all of that didn't help.' Kodua had fellow West Ham academy graduate Freddie Potts as his team-mate at Wycombe. It initially helped the young forward settle, but as the weeks turned into months, his confidence drained. Kodua was away from loved ones and became homesick. The forward is from Custom House, in Newham, east London, and the youngest of four brothers. In April 2023, he captained West Ham to an FA Youth Cup triumph — their first in 24 years — over Arsenal. That Arsenal side featured Ethan Nwaneri and Myles Lewis-Skelly, and had Wilshere — his current boss — as manager. Kodua's audacious dink from 35 yards showcased his huge potential. He ended the 2022-23 season with 15 goals across 28 appearances for the under-18s. In the previous campaign, he registered 11 goals in 26 league games for the youth team. Kodua's form prompted Matt Bloomfield, the then Luton manager who had coached Kodua at Wycombe, to sign him. But the transition from academy football to League One was stark. 'I turned to God a lot,' says Kodua. 'I'd read the Bible, and the verse Philippians 4:13 I'd constantly read, which is that I can do all things through Christ. That was one of the verses that stuck with me. Even though I wasn't doing well, I was still reading. At Wycombe, there were a lot of Christians and we used to have a Bible study group. It helped me massively and kept me going on the right path. I felt all alone, but I'm glad I threw myself in the deep end. When I started going back home to my family, that's when I gradually started to feel better. I was slowly building my confidence again. Little steps. I knew I had to snap out of all the negative thoughts and not hold them in. Talking to people helped. When I was holding it in and putting on a brave face, that made everything worse. When I'd go home,